64
When I’m 64…well, that’s Today, Sunday 02/22/2026.
The Kids will be here later Today, Take Out from Gayle’s, Ribs, Mac&Cheese and a Carrot Cake. Open a few cards and presents, watch the last episode of the latest season, last season(?) of Mandalorian and call it a Birthday.
That kinda sums me up, simple pleasures, no real extravagance and that is one of the Reasons that I feel ready to Retire and that Retirement just might not be difficult to enjoy. That last line might not resonate with anyone reading along but, Retirement is for me, the next Undiscovered Country, not Death, not yet, that awaits us all and is perhaps the ultimate Undiscovered Country, but, for the What’s Next, and the Fears that have come along with the Anticipation of Change, that is what Limbo is for me, was for me, that had me in its grip without me even recognzing that I had been caught and paralyzed, trapped in a state of fear masquerading as Anger, Blame, Resentment and Greed.
But, that has left. I cannot garauntee that those Four Horsemen will not return but Today, no long Shadows, no approaching Hoofbeats.
No, Today, I am Sailing with Fair Winds and Following Seas.
The mind is strange, well, my mind is strange. When I was a liitle Boy, my Ma would read and eventually have me read out of Her ancient copy of Hamlet when we were at bus stops or sitting in a wating room or lobby. The book is gold leafed, a red leather cover and pocket sized; my Ma always had it in Her Pocket Book She didn’t use the word Purse. I also grew up on StarTrek and when Kirk would say, “- to Boldly go where no man has gone before-” my Ma would yell atthe TV from the kitchen, “To go Boldly You ignoramus!” every time…the Undiscovered Country, Death in Hamlet, Peace between Star Fleet and the Klingon Empire in Star Trek. And my “current mood” Sailing with Fair Winds and Following Seas, a Maritine reference; my childhood dream was to attend the Maritime Academy in Vallejo, city of my birth and then become a Merchant Marineand then an Astronaut. May Ma’s book of Hamlet is next to my Pops book of Meditations on a shelf next to my bed. I eventually pursued sailing here in the Monterey Bay, and I am and have been in my own Way, an Astronaut.
The mind is strange, my mind is strange, in its Way of Being Here Now and yet, being There Then.
When Cin asked me what I wanted for my Birthday (I usually say something like, I have everything I need) I said “A clean house” off handedly and not sarcasitcally but froma someday point of view not having any expectaion of that occuring as a Birthday Present but Cin went to great efforts along with getting help from Boo and Ben to move the heavy stuff around and Cin also hired a couple of Profesional Housekeeper Ladies to do the scrubbing and holy fucking shit the majority of the Castle is spic and span. And Cin had the Ladies detail Boo’s Cottage as well. re there a couple rooms that didnt ge the treatment? Yes. Does that fucking natter? Fuck no. Thank You Cin.
This Morning I am neither on the couch nor in The Chair tapping on the keys, I am sitting in one of what was my Ma’s dining room chairs at Her little table that She would sit at while having an awful cup of Folgers with condensed milk and sugar while filling in the Saturday new York Times Crossword Puzzle in ink.
Lil Bear is behind me on he couch, Cin was there all Nite with the boob tube on as She couldn’t sleep, 2nd Nite in a row, She will be bat shit Today unless She falls asleep sometime this Morning. That fucking couch, it is great for laying down but it is one uncomfortable mother fucker for just sitting, god afwul and I see why the Old Woman sold it to me for $900 some Years back; She bought it for $10,000. Can you fucking imagine spending 10 grand on a fucking couch? And yeah, 900 bucks isn’t something sneeze at but, fuck, 10 grand? You would think it would be comfortable; I’m a sucker for the look of that classic card room heavy leather furniture…
This Morning I will likely hit the Farmers Market; I haven’t been in a bit and I haven’t seen the Cosmopolitans in an age…A Beach Walk sometime Today and then Home to celebrate 64.
Grateful to have made it to the Silver Years, to be 64 Years old and counting. To be Retiring soon. Grateful that Cin has Retired, that we will be Retired Together…kind of a theme happening here…Grateful for Cin. For my Kids. The Pups. For Sammi and soon I will have to tell Her the direction I have chosen, a new Trajectory a new Mission, the Undiscovered Country of Retirement. For whatthe Gig has provided, will continue to provide. For Frineds and Fellowship. For the Fellas. For Meetings and Markets. For the Beach. For the Tacoma and Camper which will be pressed into its rightful service.
For the Gym it too will recieve proper attention and use. For the Acre, Sanctuary. For my upbringing and Dreams fullfilled in unexpected Ways. For Books and Memories. For the Helath I have yes, imperfect but, still up and running and able to achieve gains. For Blue Skies, Fair Winds and Following Seas. For this Day to Practice and to Continue.
